A World Without "T"

Hello again my friends,

Thank you all for posting such wonderful comments on my page yesterday...all I can say is WOW your support means so very much to me. Sometimes it is hard to look at ones self and really be able to see, I always have seen myself as not very outgoing, shy, reserved and held back from being me. So it was so good to hear all these wonderful comments about my In progress pics. You my inspirations, inspire me everyday and so glad I have you to encourage and support me as well. So that is your new names cause that's what you do for me you inspire me. You make me want to keep going, you make me know I am not alone, and you make me know the feelings and struggles that I have are shared. Because we have a common thread that holds us a tie that bonds.

First Of all I want to thank Jo a New friend of mine but very dear to my heart all ready, she has made my day today and AMAZING is all I can say about her and that doesn't even begin to describe the impression she has left on my heart. When someone tells you that you have inspired them, It is one of the most incredible feelings in the world to know that you have touched someone in this way. I have only been bloging for less then two weeks about 10 days, but the joys I have gotten here are unbelievable it I would have known, If i would have believed, I would have started at birth...LOL But for real I am AMAZED that I am actually able to inspire anyone. So thank you so much Jo for making me someone who had the privilege of touching your life.

I had all these big plans for my blog last night, and the computer would not cooperate with any of it, so I tried to save it and lost that too. So this is starting over from scratch. Our schedules didn't mesh well at all last night Courtney was sick and left school early, Sean had weather coverage and didn't know how long he would be, so dinner was delayed and schedule was modified. We did finally get to eat, but not together and with the rain and storms we didn't get our 5K in so I opted for some good ole' around the house exercise which was fun and exhausting all at the same time, so it was good.

One of the things I look at the most on my blog is, “Whether you think you can, or think you can't you're right” That statement is so true. So many times we have said this is to hard, I cant do this, I don't want to try anymore. Then what you have done is created in your mind a reason “an excuse” not to, and you may not even realize what you have done. I have heard them with Sean, I have heard them with me, I have watched us give up by giving into what we tell ourselves we can not do.

The thing I have noticed is when I was 345 I had never been that high before, EVER. I always was between 200 and 250 . So even though I have dropped 142 pounds I am only where I have already been before, so I want to see myself at 150,140 ,130 somewhere that I have never been since high school. I have to see it I want to see, and I will. Where as Sean is already in a different place, a place he has never been in his whole adult life, In fact the face that looks back at me I have NEVER seen it is AMAZING and I want him to see the face he has never seen before in me. That is why I keep going that is why I am not done, that is why friends and family always notice such a difference in Sean and not in me, because I have been here before. Most of my adult life never getting below 200lbs this face and this skin I am is gonna change and I will become the butterfly that is locked up still.

Take away the T and what you have is CAN

I cant do this today
I cant change my eating habits
I cant do this for life
I cant handle the stress
I cant get motivated
I cant stay motivated
I cant stop mood eating
I cant enjoy the foods i like
I cant handle a buffet
I cant get past my mind set
I cant eat just one
I cant resist temptation
I cant see my future changing
I cant see myself thin
I cant look people in the eye
I cant change myself
I cant picture things different
I cant dream
I cant I cant I cant I cant





Cheers to new beginnings,
Irene