Thank you and saying good-bye poem by Irene Anderson

Hello,

WOW...Thank you all for your comments and for adding me, that means so much!!
....you guys are amazing...explains why Sean loves you all so much...

When I started losing weight I was miserable, just wanted out of this "fat suit" that I had done to myself so bad. Blamed it on a lot of things my thyroid, my quitting smoking after 17 years or more, nobody doing it with me....and the list goes on and on. I do have thyroid dis function that does make it hard to lose weight, cause my metabolism is rock bottom half the time, and when you stop smoking you do want to replace it with something, so I replaced them with skittles...lol and that went on for two years until I started smoking again, and of course it is easier to lose weight if you have someone to lose it with you. Someone to walk and talk and encourage you along the way. I blamed it on my job, sitting behind a computer all day 5-6 days a week sometimes 10 hours a day and eating skittles, of course I gained. Got up to 345 and so ashamed and embarrassed of that number, but it is what it is, at 5"7" or 5"6" what ever height I am it was devastating to me and I had no idea I weighed that much. I knew I felt bad and it was hard to breath at times, but it wasn't until I went to my doctor for my thyroid that I got on some scales and for the first time ever realized what I had done.

I knew I had to get busy, my first thought was quit my job, and find something where I could have more movement. Stop sitting around and eating skittles all day, what is the matter with you. I did that and now 130 some pounds later and a little over two years ago, I am now a floor manager at a casino and have non stop movement. Although movement isn't everything, it has been slow for me, because I struggle with pop...Pepsi to be exact, okay I am a Pepsi addict.... there I said it, if it wasn't so good we would have less problems, but that is my ice cream, my pastry, my worst temptation is pop...Sean still has that face whenever he sees me with it that says, "really your still gonna have pop, thought you were serious Irene" Well I am and I try to pass it off like his ice cream, cause i cant have ice cream so I just tell him a can of Pepsi is 150 and so is our ice cream cone, its just what I choose to have. Although I have come along way with the pop, we don't have two liters in the house anymore and so I can resist the temptation there, but at the place where I work, pop is free and in every room there is to choose from, but no Pepsi so less tempting...lol. I have cut it way back from where it was, and soon I will let it go completely, I drink a lot of coffee, tea, and water with the flavoring though, the problem is I hate the taste of water without something sweet, or unless I am sweating and then there is nothing better.


I also struggle with some foods, pastry and sweets have never been a real problem for me, but moderataion has, and so its hard to explain the skittles, I honestly don't know what got into me, I guess just something I could get from the vending machine with a lot in a bag and sit there and have something in my mouth.... When I was growing up we had a garden beautiful, big and all summer we would take care of it and my aunts garden too, hers was right next to ours. We would eat from that garden all year round I have always been a fan of fruits and vegetables, but of late not so much of either, mainly chicken, steak and I always have to have a vegetable, but not the real good ones....I have a lot of improvements I need to make to eating better, for example with my job it is hard to eat while I am there, we are constantly busy so usually I get one meal a day on average and sometimes two, but very rarely three, and differently no time for snacks, which is what Sean has been doing," feeding the wood burning stove", and I know if I can do this it will help. I know I can do it, but while I'm still losing it is easily justified to me, mind you I'm not losing as fast as I should or could without it, but still losing. Something I have to improve on....my goal is to be where I want to be by summer 2010 140 pounds or "what ever feels right".I I used to think that I just wanted to be under 200 lbs but that is no longer my goal, it is now to be the best me I can be in every way. I know I sset another goal before the first one was completed, but thats how I am going to get to the next one, can't stop and celebrate just yet....

used to think that I just wanted to be under 200 lbs but that's no longer my goal, it is now to be the best me I can be in every way. i know I set another goal before the first one was completed, but thats how Im going to get to the next one can't stop and celebrate just yet....


I'm saying Good-bye

Saying good-bye to bad choices and horrible thinking,
Good-bye to tight fits and clothes cause baby I'm shrinking;

Good-bye to the snickers and awkward glances when I walk into a room,
Good-bye to the "someday" cause it's gonna be very soon;

Good-bye to the temptations that have always held me back before,
Good-bye to the "I cant's" cause I don't believe that anymore;

Good-bye to the insecurity and doubt that comes into my brain,
Good-bye to the excuses cause there is none that remain;

Good-bye to the yesterdays and good-bye to the past;
Good-bye to the fears I ve had that I can't make this last;

Good-bye to the mental hangups and thoughts that I will fail,
Good-bye to the I cant succeed, cause I know this time its for real;

Good-bye to the things that have always gotten in my way,
Good-bye to the poor choices, cause there is nothing that can make me stray;



Irene Anderson 2009


In closing I just wanna say how pleased I am to have all of you that have added me and have left me comments, It is a privilege to share with you and such an inspiration to me to follow you on your journeys as well. Thank you for taking the time to visit me....It means so much!!!


Cheers to new beginnings,
Irene